The Company You Keep

Experts say we are a reflection of the company that we keep. There is a commonly referred to statement that alludes to the fact that you are the average of the five people you spend the most time with.  You become best at what you spend time doing.  You are good at your job today not so much because of your degree but because you spend every day there.  That is why people treasure experience. The habits of the people we spend time with consistently will inevitably rub off on us. The financial habits, thinking, speech will also rub off on us. If you were told you would become like the people you spend time with, does the possible outcome look attractive to you? You may have fun with them but are you happy to have that as your eventuality?  As you contemplate what we are going to do different this year, think about the company you keep. Think about the people you spend time with as a support group.  Everybody does need some sort of support system in your lives.  Are you with Poverty Support Group or a Wealth Creation Support Group?  Here are some of the differences that you may relate with and can help you identify where you currently stand.

A poverty support group takes pride in where they spent their money.  Especially now after the festive season many of them are meeting to talk about what they did, where they went, how much they used to spend, how late they used to get home (or are still getting home).  Many of these groups are now lamenting about how January will be a tough month.  The fact that they spent money that was supposed to be for school fees is something that they feel in their groups is worth mentioning. It’s like a young student getting a golden star on a test paper. The recklessness in spending is displayed like a badge of honour.  Despite the “life is hard in January” conversations, many of them are still meeting in places where they end up spending money as they have these discussions. They are having a coffee or having a drink. Doing the very things that do indeed make life hard but not realising it.  Another characteristic of these support groups is that they want to outshine each other in someway.  Though they are in the group, they always want to show that they are a bit superior in some way.  So usually they will buy things to impress each other. As I always say – these things are not bad; it’s the “buy to impress” that gets us into problems. The latest gadgets, clothes, shoes, cars may be purchased with the intent of impressing those in the group.  Do they want to make money? Of course they do. But between the spending and life is hard, they hope to one day just win a tender or a deal that sorts themselves and the piling financial issues out. Their conversations about people they deem to be wealthy hovers around those who have gotten a deal and the fruits of the deal are now evidenced by the car they drive, clothes they wear or house they are living in. The poverty support group also meets up to play the blame game.  Their current situation is always someone else’s fault.  They have a bad boss, their employer doesn’t pay them well, the economy is not doing well, Interest rates are too high etc.  They spend a lot of time talking about why they cannot do something.

A wealth creation support group is not necessarily evidenced by the amount of money they have. This group sees no need in advertising where they spent their money. They may share about their experience e.g. where they traveled to but not how much money was recklessly spent. This month of January is about setting plans and goals for the year.  Understanding what they want to achieve and what resources they need to put together.  I recently sat in a unique group where they actually keep each other accountable. No one mentioned how they spent money allocated for school fees.  They understand talking about how bad things are makes things worse.  You get what you focus and talk about. Their focus is on the actions that are needed to be able to make things better.  They talk about opportunities that are available. They constantly expand their group to include people who are ten steps ahead of them in the journey so they can learn. They talk about resources including networks, time and money that they can tap into.  When they do buy things – it is not to impress each other.  They understand that the material things they own play no part in how wealthy they are.  They take pride in the process of building and growing investments, business ventures, seeing ideas to fruition and not the car they drive. They think about growth not expenditure. That understand the fact that life is hard is neither a surprise nor the universe’s way of unfairly punishing an individual.  Life is hard for everyone in different ways at different seasons.  They just know that those challenges present the best opportunities to grow in character. They also take responsibility and recognise the challenges that have come about as a result of their own habits. They know how to say – ‘It’s my fault’.  Because of that they empower themselves to change habits.  They know a deal is not going to appear from nowhere and they are invested in the process of wealth creation. They are doing it in the same environment that the poverty support group complains about. These are the 5% of the population who end up owning 95% of the wealth.

Can you see why?  You want things to be different this year.  Change your conversations. Change your support group.