Dealing with Fear

Last week in our Centonomy classes we put people in groups and told them to come up with ideas to make a certain amount of money.  All the groups came up with fantastic ideas.  As we discussed implementation of these ideas, we also talked about the reasons that people thought that these ideas would not work.  Maybe you have experienced this before.  You could have been in a group of people or you could even have come up with ideas by yourself.  It looked good in principle and on paper but you didn’t go ahead.  Why?  Well, the number one reason why many people said they would not go ahead is because of Fear.  This prevents people from making bold moves but wealth creation is the consequence of a series of bold moves.  People have not done various investments because of fear.  Others have not started businesses because of fear.  Others have not changed jobs because of fear. Others have not moved out of home because of fear.  Others have not developed networks or partnerships because of fear. Many have not had the conversations they need to have because of fear.  The many things we may not have done because of fear can fill up this entire page.  Now just to manage your expectations, this article is not supposed to be the magic blue pill for fear.  You will not read it and immediately feel a sense of relief as fear departs from you.  I write this as person who has had to confront fear time and time again.  I write this as I remember the discussions on this topic I had with Centonomy students last week.

So whatever you are facing at the moment and you are feeling scared at the thought of doing, remember fear is not necessarily a sign that you should not do it.  For example there is an investment in front of you and you feel scared about it. The feeling itself of fear is an emotion. It is not necessarily the truth about a situation. Of course make sure you have done the necessary research about the investment but do not let fear control your decision. You can decide to do the investment in spite of the fear. You can decide to start the business in spite of the fear. So there is nothing wrong with being scared, just do not let that fear be the reason you do not do something. The more you make decisions out of fear, the more it will control you. If you don’t do the investment primarily because you are scared, even for the next investment you will be scared.  If you do it in spite of fear, it starts having less and less of a grip on you. If you can’t tell the difference between information and fear get someone to help you look at the facts objectively.  We once had a student in our class that admitted she would analyse investments with the aim of getting to why she should not invest.  In this case fear had already made her decision for her even before she got to the investment. There was no way she was going to look at the investment objectively.  Sometimes as well, fear may also be the reason why you actually go ahead and do something.  For example you may do this investment because other people expect you to and you don’t want to annoy them.  Despite the fact that you are investing money, it is still fear driving the decision-making.  Whenever you are about to do an action based on fear, question it.

As you deal with fear, acknowledge that any time you are moving out of a comfort zone you will feel scared.  In fact I have come to believe that if I am not scared about anything, I am not pushing myself to the next level. If you have never invested in the stock market you will be scared about investing.  If you have never started a business you will be scared about that move.  If you are moving to a new job you will be scared.  It means you are pushing boundaries. Wealth is never created within a comfort zone.  Even those people for all intense and purpose that we would consider wealthy, are still scared because they continue pushing themselves to the next level. Therefore conquering fear is not about the absence of it but ability to proceed through it and in spite of it.  Someone in our class raised a good point.  Isn’t something like the fear of being poor good because it will drive you to invest, make money etc.?  I disagreed with this.  Fear of poverty will keep you in poverty.  It is possibly because of that same fear that you will not invest because you are scared of loosing money.  Let something that you actually want to achieve drive you.  Instead of your goal being – “I will invest because I don’t want to be poor”, let it be “I will invest because I want to be wealthy or retire comfortably or educate my children”.  The first one is driven by fear of poverty. You will continue to be scared.  The second one is driven by things you actually want to happen.  Work towards what you want; don’t run away from what you do not want.  In a nutshell, fear will be with you.  You will be scared when you push yourself out of comfort zones.  However you can decide to not let it control you. Have a fearless day.